


My best bro's brother

by Slysmoke



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Karkat Vantas/Nepeta Leijon - Freeform, M/M, Sugar Daddy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-18
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-12-03 19:11:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11538663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slysmoke/pseuds/Slysmoke
Summary: When his best friend anounce him he discovered himself a younger brother, John really couldn't have imagined it'd evolve this way.





	My best bro's brother

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry in advance for the grammar, I do not master english perfectly.  
> Inspired by this : http://raddical.tumblr.com/post/156904565757/dirkjohn-discord-is-going-great  
> I think I didn't fucked up the color [forget it it doesn't work] or been too OOC, but you never know.  
> I hope you'll have fun to read this anyway !

Light rays of sun successfully crossed the windows through the small space left by the curtains, closed negligently the night before.

Playfully, they didn't wait long before ending on the shut eyes of the sleeping owner of the room.

 

Said owner, growling in the usual way of "I want to sleep more fuck off", slowly but angrily covered his offended face with his blanket, wishing to keep his wonderful feeling of comfort and laziness a bit longer .

However, not only it was to late, the sun having made a good job at waking him up and unfairly grabbed him out of his slumber, but his father, by a sort of mystique power only him possessed, seemed to _sense_ he was awake.

 

"John ? Are you awake ? The breakfast is ready, young man."

 

To be totally honest, John was pretty sure his dad knew, thanks to his sixth-fatherly-super-sense or whatever, that he was awake.

The "young man" wouldn't even be surprised if his father estimated his wake up time by looking the position of the sun and judging it would reach him precisely at this moment.

 

Sighing with all the dramatic effect he could manage, John pushed away the blanket, sitting on his bed to stretch with a loud yawn. He left the already fading away warmth of his bed, jumping on his feet with an energy no one would have suspected from him few seconds earlier.

 

His gaze grazed the mirror in his room, only resting on his own form absently - he wasn't one to really care about appearance, just enough to actually not look like living in a dump. His father wouldn't allow him to look neglected, being a fine young man meant having acceptable out-looking !

 

His eyes caught briefly the sight of a twenty year old boy, in an old ghost buster shirt and large boxer, his favorite sleeping outfit. His hair was a mess, like every time he woke up, and the brilliant blue of his pupils was seen even without his glasses.

 

Of course, these one being on his night shelf, he could only see a blurry version of himself - but John knew already how he looked, so it didn't matter.

Instead of giving this thought some fuck, his hand reached to grab the rectangular classic glasses he absolutely needed, at least if he wanted to see enough to not trip on the first rock on his path.

 

In the kitchen, James Egbert, business man at work and baker at home, winner of the last Egbert-pie-throwing contest, and, if you listen to his son, own of creepy super-dad-mystic-power, turned on his feet to face the younger man entering the kitchen.

 

John wished he wasn't welcomed with a damn cake, but he learned a long time ago it was a fruitless hope.

 

"Hello son. Did you sleep well ? I made a Forêt Noire today."  
A forêt noire. For breakfast. Sure dad.

 

John ignored the cake, even turning his face away from it with a wince, has he aimed for a cupboard, starting to prepare things in order to eat what he called a good, _normal_ breakfast.

 

"Hi dad. I won't eat it, you know this, right ?"

 

"You hurt me son, I put all my fatherly love in it."

Blues eyes rolled in a mimic of annoyance, but a slight grin was fighting to take place on John's lips, mirroring the amusement sparkling in the deep, blue-grey eyes of the older man standing in the room. He wasn't wearing his fedora yet, letting black strained with grey hair at free sight for once.

 

However, the fact they were in weekend didn't prevent the man from wearing his usual shirt and pants. A person meeting him right now would believe he was about to leave for work, but no. That was his casual outfit.

 

But John and his friends were used to it now. Either Jade, Dave, Rose... Even Karkat.

Thinking about it, it was long time since he didn't see the girls. Karkat was living not far, and Dave left Texas to the big town near to his own smaller one. They could now see each other often, and that was absolutely great.

 

The brunette shook his head, deciding to eat his cereals before them getting all soaked - too late, it seemed - then to prepare himself for the day. As much as he liked his ghostbuster shirt, it wasn't an ideal outfit to go outside.

 

 

He was just coming out of the shower, wearing fresh clothes and putting his glasses on his nose, when the little flashing show on his computer screen was noticed. Seemed like one of his friend was pestering him. Despite all having each other phone, they used nearly always pesterchum - phone were for real emergency.

 

So the young man wasn't feeling any rush when he settled himself in front of his computer.

 

Looked like in fact several peeps tried to pester him. First was a new composition from Jade, that she was sending to him to have his opinion. Second Karkat reminding him their movie session planned this afternoon, because he was a "FUCKING FORGETFUL EXCUSE OF A PRETENDED FRIEND SOMETIMES". Sweet. Of course John would never admit he actually _indeed_ forgot before reading Karkat's memo.

Instead the brunette answered something about "how he could forget this, geez."

 

Otherwise the last person successfully threw all of his thoughts about nice (bad) movies session out of the mental window.

It was Dave, and the blonde let him what looked like thousand messages.

 

TG : dude

TG : dude

TG : dude no lying this fucking emergency

TG : i mean it isn't obviously otherwise i would have called

TG : but it's like 2 in the morning i can't call you for that shit my bro pulled out of his metaphorical hat again

TG : shit there's a guy in my poor joke of amazing kitchen-living room bedroom and

TG : he's my brother

TG : he's not BRO, i mean i have a fucking, actual brother and i had no fucking idea

TG : where is my chill

TG : my chill is out the windows flying to neverland that's where it is

TG : of course i'm chill as usual in appearance i have standards to keep but

TG : fuck he even has these sweet stupid shades bro had and i had before you pulled out these rad i wear now out of your ass

TG : he looks like someone scanned bro, selected the "minus 20 years options" and printed it

TG : fuck what am i supposed to do

TG : he also has fucking freckles what the actual fuck

 

And it continued with endless rambles typical of Dave, but John's mind was like frozen.

 

_What._

 

==================================

 

A blond adolescent was standing in the empty hall, a big bag at his feet. Through his pointy, anime-like shades, his orange eyes were watching the door in front of him as if he could dig a hole in it with just the strength of his gaze.

 

Nothing was betraying the storm of feelings currently raging on in his heart, Strider chill well plastered on his face. Nevermind the fact he was now looking at this door for an abnormal amount of time now.

 

Allowing himself to let escape a small sigh, the stranger managed to bring himself to push the button next to the door, releasing a weird sound inside the apartment. Of course _this_ place couldn't have a casual, plain doorbell.

 

For a short moment, the blonde was worried no one was inside, or that he made a mistake - how would have it been possible even, but what if...

Then footsteps resonated on the other side of the door.

 

All his muscles tensed sightly, even if it wasn't visible.

 

The sound of a locket unbolted, then the door swayed open in front of the adolescent.

 

In front of him, was standing a little older man, as blond as him thought minus the little touches of ginger scattering his own hair, and wearing a sweet pair of shades.

The yawn and general behavior and outfit of the man showed he just woke up, probably because of the doorbell.

 

"Su-..."

 

He couldn't even finish his usual greeting before his voice got cut sharply, his eyebrow jumping so high they got lost in his hair like eager explorers in a new jungle.

 

"Sup. My name is Dirk Strider, and there's 99,9% chance that I'm your brother."

 

 

===============================================================

 

It required the minimal amount of time allowed to a Strider to discover and acknowledge the fact he's having a brother for 16 years without knowing and of course fucking coffee for Dave to finally consider that yes, his fucking Bro hid from him he had a fucking _step brother_.

 

"So. Dirk Strider, right ?"

 

"That's what I said."

So charming, really.

 

"And you're Dave, am I correct ?"

 

The older blonde nodded, sipping his coffee while overthinking and trying to not flip his shit out. He already panicked a bit over John on Pesterchum, and that was enough freaking out for now.

 

Dave otherwise allowed himself to curse Bro once more, for putting him in this horse shit.

 

"So." He stated finally to speak - better getting over this awkward situation. "Why are you here ? Now ?"

 

The other boy didn't answer right away, instead looking for something in his bag. Travel bag. Like, having all his shit put in it.

 

Sweat barely formed on Dave's forhead.

They were sitting on the poor excuse of a couch that he managed to buy with his even poorer excuse of a salary, both sitting the farest possible from each other.

 

Finally, the freckled blond pulled out a paper, reaching it towards Dave, who honestly took it as if the thing was about to explode or eat his fingers.

 

It was a letter, obviously written by Bro and addressed to Dirk.

To resume, the "adult" left his son with just enough money to afford few months of his usual train of life, and suggested him to go bother the other member of the Strider family.

 

So to say, Dave himself.

 

His face rose from the paper, glancing to the younger copy of Bro on his couch.

"You knew about me before this letter ?"

 

Dirk shook his head. Well, he couldn't say he was surprised here - totally Bro's way to act like this. Not giving information and shit.

 

"And I guess you don't have other family member...?"

Sure it was hopeless, but worth trying.

 

"Obviously, I wouldn't be here with a guy who want nothing more than flee the fuck out, otherwise."

 

Dave frowned, starting to get less panicked and more annoyed with time passing and words flying.

"Nothing restrain you here either, you know."

He deadpanned, relaxing in his couch. If the kid kept with his attitude, he would just end throw him outside without regret.

 

"You mean, apart from having nowhere else to go ?"

The question is pretty sarcastic, assorted with a perfectly risen eyebrow. Dave sighed.

 

"Dude, listen. I honestly don't mind you here."

 

"No shit."

It was Dirk's turn to deadpan, in a "as if I believe you" tone of voice. The angry gaze that Dave's addressed him in answer would have been more efficient if he wasn't wearing shades, of course.

 

"Really. In the texts, I'm a cool guy, wouldn't let a bro outside in the cold like a douche lord. But look, it's like a fucking hutch here, it's already crowded with just me and my stuff. And I barely handle the bills and food, I just can't manage to support you like a lovely princess in his castle made of low-rent apartment. No fucking fairy tale here none of us has enough hair to pick up a prince through the window, Rapunzel."

 

Strangely, the shadow of a smirk crossed Dirk's lips, as if he was finding Dave's ramble funny. And the older blonde was used enough to try to see any betrayal of human emotions on Bro's face to notice it.

 

However it didn't last more than a crumble of a second.

 

"So you don't want me here." It wasn't even a question that Dirk blurted out.

 

Dave had to struggle hard to not sigh again.

"No, I'm saying if you want to stay here - and honestly you should really check your other options - you'll have to bring money if you don't want us to starve to death. Official game of Don't Starve, _Strider in shitty apartment_ edition."

 

"How old are you anyway ?"

He asked while his words let Dirk in a state of deep thinking.

 

"Sixteen."

Shit, so Bro had fun when himself was... four ? Heck.

 

"Well anyway, that's the only way. You can live here, but you'll have to sleep on the couch - it can be turned into a bed I'm not that of a heartless guy - and bring some money so we can feed ourselves. Or at least yourself, I manage to buy my own food at least."

 

Dirk nodded.

"Fine with me."

Then, letting his bag on the floor where he put it, the youngest walked to the door, letting Dave perplexed.

 

"Where are you going ?"

 

The youngest didn't even stopped while answering.  
"What do you think. Finding some money, of course."

 

Dave decided he needed more sleep.

 

==================================================================

 

EB : dave !

EB : jeez dude you can't release a bomb like this and just leave.

EB : daaaaaaaaaave.

EB : ...

TG : calm your tits dude, your lord and savior is here

EB : finally ! what happened ? what is this story about a brother ?!

TG : like i said

TG : seems like bro had swooned some lady when i was four

TG : and hop ! by magic, sweet baby bro is born

EB : woah.

EB : so now you have a brother ?

EB : like, a real brother, i mean, not like Bro.

EB : you get me.

TG : yeah, sure

TG : step brother thought

TG : not the same mother

EB : and what about his mother ? she let him leave ?

TG : if the guy is anything like a strider

TG : and he is

TG : his mother is either awful and he had to leave, in such a poor state she can't support him, or dead

EB : oh no ! these options are all so sad ! D':

EB : but now he has you, right ?

EB : and you have him !

TG : except he left

EB : what ?!

TG : i told him he needed to make money to live here and he went out to find some

EB : daaaaaaaaaaaaaaave !

TG : hey, couldn't imagine he would do it right away

EB : where is he ?

TG : no fucking damn slightest idea

EB : ...

TG : don't worry, he'll come back

TG : maybe

EB : Dx

 

===========================================================

 

With all this, John nearly forgot for real to show up at Karkat's movie session - luckily the other sent him a text to remind him just one hour before.

Honestly it was hard to focus on the movies. His friend noticed it, of course.

 

"Are you going to pull your head out of your ass already and actually listen to one fucking word of this movie someday ? Leave me a memo or something so I'll know when to organize the "welcome back brain" party. Admitting you have a brain, that is."

 

Sometimes Karakt's deadpan tone really reminded him of Dave. John wondered why all his male friends were douches. Was it a curse or something ?

 

"Jeez, sorry dude. Just, something happened with Dave and I can't get my mind over it."

 

"Wow, you mean something happened to the most famous and perfect gay couple of no-homo Land ?"

 

Snorting, the brunette punched the offender's shoulder.

"Shut up you stupid shipper. You and Nepeta really should stop imagining things."

 

"Nepeta's OTPs are sacred territory, fuckass. Can't put a single toe on it. So sorry to tell you that, but you're officially carved in the stone with Dave as the most cute couple of her life. Until she finds another one, of course."

 

John rolled his eyes, amused still.

"God, put a leash on your girlfriend, seriously."

 

"Is that a fucked up reference to her cat-like attitude and cat puns ?"

The big grin just under deep blue eyes was a perfectly clear answer.

 

"Who I am to restrain her ? A good boyfriend's job is to keep his girlfriend happy, right ?"

Karkat said it with a sorry tone, like he was wrists and ankles tied. But he wasn't trying to hide his mocking smile, and John let himself fall against the couch with a groan.

 

"More seriously, what horseshit Strider managed to pull out this time ?"

Dave and him were friends, in the way you are with someone you like nothing more than annoy the fuck out. At least it was perfectly reciprocate.

 

"Not sure I can talk about it really... It's a bit of a big stuff. I prefer let him decide what to do about it."

 

"Oh, so you didn't have an argument ! I'm relieved, I believed I'll have to comfort my poor girlfriend crying all the water of her body over her dead ship like a woman married to a sailor lost in the sea and that will never come back."

 

"God damnit Karkat, I repeat you I'm not gay, and certainly not for Dave !"

 

"Keep telling you that. But your heart knows the truth."

John groaned more louder than earlier, then Karkat started to sing "listen to your heart" (really badly) and it was officially the start of a merciless pillow war.

 

===================================================================

 

The evening, John had a little comic show planned at Rose's mom bar. The girl wouldn't be there thought, probably either drowned in her psychology studies or trying to catch some time with her girlfriend.

 

Her mom was nice enough to let him take over the scene a bit, even assuring him he was doing a great job - but John laughed it off each time, not taking it seriously. He also helped a bit by playing the waiter sometime, but tonight he was under the spotlight.

 

He spent a little more than half an hour on the scene, before letting the music take back its place for a little while. Too many jokes would end bothering the customers, but short spectacles were fine.

 

Once the brunette was at the bar, sitting on a chair and sipping his not alcoholic drink, Roxanne, reasonably sober, rushed to him. The Lalonde Mom was giggling happily, always happy and giving a nice, warm vibe to the place.

 

"Hi John ! How are you cutiepie ? You didn't seem totally totally your usual self today !"

 

If she didn't has her daughter's talent for psychology, Roxanne was gifted with great empathy, letting her able to read someone's mood easier than emptying a bottle of wine (and she was pretty fast at this).

 

"Well, just a lot on my mind ! But nothing to worry about, I promise."  
A wide grin accompanied his words, comforting the bartender.

"Oki doki funny bunny, I believe you."

 

The women own smile widened excitedly all of sudden, and John's eyebrow rose in answer.

 

"Did you spot the guy at the end of the counter ?! Doesn't he look like Dave ? With the anime shades and all."

 

Her hand gestured to her right, towards the figure she was talking about. A thought was bouncing crazily inside John's mind, it wasn't possible but...

 

Blue eyes landed on what indeed looked like a copy of Dave for a "find the seven differences" game. Pointy hair, pointy shades unlike the ones the man offered to his friend, and looking a bit younger. He was drinking some... Orange juice ? For sure Roxanne would never had sold him alcohol if he was underage.

 

Dave's only love was apple juice, so it was another difference. But anyway, it wasn't John's friend under his gaze. But he had a good enough idea of who it was anyway.

 

With a wink at Mom Lalonde, as people often called her, the novice comic grabbed his glace and left his seat, walking calmly to the stranger to sit next to him, grinning wide.

 

"Hello~ !"

He shouted with enthusiasm.

 

The other looked around suspiciously, to acknowledge the fact that, yes, the hyperactive-looking brunette was talking to him. He then emitted a sound that could be taken as a 'hi', with a lot of imagination.

 

"Daw kid, not feeling well ? Does your brother threw you out with the mission to make some money or something ?"

 

Prankster gambit tingling, John was working hard on hiding his grin for a compassionate expression. If he wasn't used to Dave's pokerface and his usual habit of not showing emotions as if it would burn his face if he dared to, he would have missed the show of surprise on the blonde face.

 

Luckily for him, he didn't miss one bit of it, no matter how light were the changes caused in his expression.

 

"No."

The adolescent turned his attention back on his drink, with the obvious intent of ignoring the bother that incarnated by John Egbert.

 

Alas for him, said man wouldn't drop such occasion of a good prank.

"Aw come on, you can tell me ! Let me guess. It was your first meeting, and it didn't end well ?"

 

His apparent worried and gentle expression was still on when the guy looked at him again, visibly struggling to not be freaked out or break a nerve, probably.

 

"What the fuck. Are you a stalker or something ?"

The blonde abandoned his idea of denying John's affirmation, it seemed. And he suddenly looked very... Tired.

 

Dave's words suddenly popped in his mind again. About the adolescent mother's, probably sick, poor... Or dead, and his chest tightened, his will of continuing his prank vanishing with the feeling.

 

"Jeez no, I'm not. My name is John, and I'm Dave's friend."

His lips drew a sheepish smile as a small apology when the truth left them.

 

The blonde frowned slightly, but relaxed somehow.

"He talked to you about me...?"

The voice was tainted by a bit of uncertainty, as if the idea sounded absurd.

 

John nodded, smiling frankly this time.

"Yes ! He said he met his brother, and that he made him leave by accident, and no idea where he was. Dave didn't tell me your name thought ?"

 

The adolescent was hesitant, studying the older man for a moment as if to find any hint he was lying.

"Dirk. And what do you mean, 'by accident' ? He clearly expressed that I had to bring fucking money if I wanted to live with him."

 

John has a little, patronizing sigh.  
"He just tried to explain he doesn't make a lot of money, at least not enough for you two ! Dave's barely make it for just himself, so two will be too much."

 

A second sigh escaped the brunette, half filled with annoyance this time. He rested his chin in his hand, elbow on the wood of the bar and pout on his face.

"I offered to help him so many time, but he never accepted ! It's a miracle if I manage to pay for us two when we go eating together..."

 

It seemed the words made Dirk think, because his hesitation was suddenly nearly tangible.

"Are you... Are you together ?"

 

"What ?"

The older gave him a perplexed glance, unsure about what the blonde tried to say.

 

"Like. Do you sleep together." Taking the sudden rise of John's eyebrow as more perplexity, he added :  
"Do you have sex ? Go out ? Kiss ?"

The sarcasm started to show at the end of his questions.

 

With a groan, the comic let his head meet the wood near his elbow in a loud noise, for more dramatic effect.

 

And as if it wasn't enough for the brunette's shame, Roxanne approached at some moment while the two mans were talking, and totally heard this part. Of course, like each time someone suggested there was something more than deep friendship between Dave and John, as often did Nepeta, seconded by Karkat, and Rose, but just to mess with him (not with Dave, because the blonde rolled with it and played along, for Nepeta's great pleasure), the woman giggled and mocked the brunette gently.

 

"Ooooh you're right ! They're so in love. Such a beautiful bromance ! Like they said !"

She cooed, and John lifted his head to give her an incredulous gaze of betrayal.

 

"Roxaaaaanne, don't say him this ! He'll believe you !"

The whine was, for sure, not really mature, but it wasn't like the brunette was considered as mature by anyone. Not until it was a serious business.

 

"So... You're not ?"

Little confusion was showing on Dirk's face despite his efforts. He didn't know this woman - John neither now he thought about it - but the two seemed friends, and friendly. Not like he would trust them right away, but chatting didn't hurt.

 

"No sweetie, they aren't. We just like bugging them about it."

She giggled.

"Well, they aren't YET. If you ask Rose, she'd tell you they're just in sort denying phase where..."

 

At the sound of John's desperate groan, accompanied with another smack of his forehead against the wood, the bartender chuckled once more and stopped her "torture".

 

"So you're Davey's brother ? I thought you were older...?"

"You must confuse me with Bro. My... Our father."

The blonde couldn't suppress the wince at this. He wasn't used to the idea yet.

 

"I'm Dirk."

He reached to her, and the woman happily checked his hand with a mimic of a charming giggle.

"I'm swooned to meet you, Dirk."

 

The shadow of a smirk shyly took place on the boy's lips, and John smiled, mouth hidden by his arms with his head resting on them. Striders could never resist Lalonde, it was like an Universe’s rule.

 

"Your brother now you're here ?"

While the youngest just shook his head, John jumped on his sit, mouth open on a small "Ah !" as the thought hit him like thunder. Quickly, he took his phone in his pocket, tapping the shortcut to call Dave.

 

At the two gazes on him, he rolled his eyes.  
"I have shortcuts for all my close friends !"

Then the brunette worked on ignoring them, waiting for his bro to answer.

 

Falling in his thoughts, Dirk didn't notice he muttered this :

"I don't think he cares where I am..."

 

"Don't say that kitty, he may sounds insensitive sometimes, but Dave cares about his friends and family."

A small blush joined the freckles on his cheeks, and he glanced at Roxanne who smiled softly.

 

The sudden burst of John's voice near to him made the blonde nearly jump out of his skin, but he contained his surprise.

"He's coming !"

 

"Ooooh Johnny bunny, is it really alright to share these personal information with us ?"

The woman's playful grin met the comic's lack of understanding.

 

Until the implicit reached his mind and the young man blush hard.

"ROXANNE !"

Once again, someone's paying sharp attention to Dirk could notice the ghost of a smile on his lips.

 

===============================================================

 

Since Dave was supposed to arrive soon, John didn't go back on the scene, instead chatting with the two blondes. Thought it was mostly between Roxanne and him, Dirk being rather silent, despite the brunette attempts to make him talk more.

 

Unlike his brother who was hard to be shut up, it seemed like this Strider inherited of the few-words way of Bro - from what Dave told John about the guy.

 

Finally the douchelord with dumb shades, also known as Dave Strider, entered the bar. The comedian stopped his blabbering, straitening on his sit and swaying his arm generically in the air to grab his attention. He was soon spotted, and the third blonde joined the group, taking the sit at John's right - making, involuntary or not, a safe-like distance between him and Dirk.

 

"Sup ?"

"Hello Davey~ You don't work tonight ?"

Roxanne cooed happily, clearly enchanted to have so many pretty boys around her.

 

"Yeah, later. I still have a bit of time, don't twist your guts mom lal'."

Being the closest to Dirk, John was the only one to notice the tensing in the youngest's muscles.

 

"You were so worried about your little bro you run there, aw."

He teased Dave, studying both boys - what made his head turn side to side in a little stupid way.

 

It was clear that the male at his right was glaring at him to convey some anger, but with the shades on it could be more obvious, and John didn't care at all.

 

"Let's say that. Anyway b... Dirk, I need to bring you back then go to work, so stop your little fan bath we're leaving."

 

The adolescent dropped his head slightly at his brother's words.

"...Didn't get any money yet."

It was barely a whisper, but the comedian was close enough to have gathered it, and he laughed.

"Dude, when Dave told you to make money, he wasn't meaning right here right now !"

 

The youngest blonde looked to his relative, as if wanting a confirmation. Who nodded slightly.

Tensed shoulders relaxed slightly, and Dirk sighed.

 

"I don't want to be a bother."

He said with a dull note in his voice, letting feelings appear for just a second.

Of course if Dave said nothing to that, only frowning, John smacked the top of the adolescent's back, laughing it off.

 

"Don't be silly, duh ! Dave will not show it but he's happy to have family left !"

And as much as Dirk was doubting that, it was hard to say no to the brilliant smile in front of him, visible even in the half-darkness of the bar.

 

It was hard to not believe that smile.

 

=========================================================

 

SLAM !

 

James Egbert looked as the vibrations made is coffee shaking in his cup, small wrinkles crossing the dark liquid.

 

A little bit dramatic, the man sighed deeply.

 

"John, I thought I told you to request the young Strider man to not slam the door so violently when he pays us an impromptu visit ?"

He politely required his son, who got the delicacy to blush.

 

"I swear I told him ! But when he gets mad he forgets..."

 

James shook his head in a stern fatherly disapproval.

"Well, at least you should welcome your friend, don't you think John ?"

 

Jumping on the occasion to not handle his father's gaze any longer, the brunette left the kitchen quickly, taking the way of his bedroom.

 

He knocked at the door gently, but entered without waiting for an answer - he knew none would come anyway.

 

His eyes met the form lying on his bed (cruel lack of courtesy, really), catching the sight of the blond hair, black shades.

 

"Dirk..."

 

Like his dad earlier, John shook his head, the name leaving his mouth like a sigh. The young man on his bed didn't move, not even showing any sign he noticed or heard the other - thought he couldn't have miss him.

 

It was now three months the two Striders shared the same small apartment, and the least we could say was that the cohabitation wasn't as smooth as everyone could wish.

The blondes often got into fights, vocal arguments that leaded most of the time to strifes... And so to Dirk's defeat, the youngest having less experience.

 

It was obvious none of them wanted to really speak out their feelings, and no fight could be resolved like this. Of course John tried to reason his best bro, even involving Jade and Rose in the process... But it was truly fruitless. Dave could be really stubborn.

 

The first times, Dirk went to the bar where he met the comedian and Roxanne, and at the end it was John who came to pick him up. Sometimes driving him home, others inviting him in his own house, when the adolescent looked too sad or furious to face his brother right away.

 

Luckily, again, John studied long enough the strider chill to be able to detect the emotions through just small wrinkle on the face in front of him. Curiously, Dave seemed terribly lacking this skill - or was he ignoring these signs in purpose ? John couldn't tell.

 

Because as soon he tried to bring up the subject of his brother, his best friend closed like a protective shell from who he was attempting to steal a pearl.

So the only things Egbert could do was support them both, and offer comfort and open ears to Dirk when he needed it. The blonde opened up to him gradually.

 

Like with the Lalonde, it seemed the Striders couldn't not like John Egbert.

 

Dirk was working, thought. He found a part-time job in a coffee job chill enough to hire an underage teenager, but the salary just covered his daily expenses, like food or clothes.

 

Logically enough, the boy liked John's house even more, able to play video games, watch movies on a big screen and eat a lot of cakes.

 

He could even borrow his computer, and now the comedian has coding softwares and other stuff on his disk that he sure didn't install himself...

 

But he didn't mind at all.

 

Right now, John walked to his bed, sitting next to the blonde, starting to pet his head while making a point to remove the solidified gel into the lock. Seemed like this product entered into the ‘first need’ list of the adolescent, despite his small checkpaye.

 

"Did you have a fight with Dave again ?"

The question was asked with a soft tone, the comedian knowing the answer already.

And, without surprise, he felt the head moving under his fingers, following the motions of a nodding.

 

"What was it this time ? He bought more apple juice than orange juice ?"

There was a chuckle in his voice, but to be honest this would totally be a topic to bring a fight over for the Striders. Juice were serious shit.

 

Dirk groaned, unamused by the joking tone.  
"Really funny, shitty pranklord. No, I just tried to mention the fact I could have some use of a computer, and he started arguing about it, talking about money again. _When he fucking use a laptop himself_."

 

"Ah..."

With a wince of sympathy, John resumed his caress in the blonde hair.

 

"He nearly got expelled once because he was late with the rent, so he doesn't want to face it again... It's not to annoy you."

 

A trembling sigh left the adolescent's mouth.

"I know..."

The words were pronounced reluctantly, as if Dirk wanted to keep telling his brother was a bad guy, when he perfectly knew he wasn't. Like things would have been easier if Dave was really mean.

 

Things were more complicated than just brother's arguments, thought. John was aware of Dave's conflicted feelings towards Bro, and having suddenly this step brother landing at his place like a fucking meteor, looking like his parental figure but younger... It was a lot to take for him, but for Dirk as well. So the situation in the little apartment was like a bomb about to explode.

 

All the time.

 

"Want to play video games ?"

Dirk moved a bit, so his face was slightly visible.

 

"Yeah."  
A wide grin showed up on John's face at the blonde's answer.

 

"I gonna kick your ass so hard in mario kart it'll send you right to the moon !"

"As if. Tell your tears to pack their stuff, they gonna leave their sweet houses in your eyes."

 

"By the way Dirk, I never asked, when is your birthday ?"

 

==========================================================

 

TG : dude

EB : oh hello dave ! :B

EB : how is everything going ?

TG : DUDE

EB : wow, some upper case, should i be worried ?

TG : did you buy a laptop to dirk

EB : no !

TG : oh okay, so should i assume he stole it

EB : NO ! that's me who gave it to him but

TG : john

EB : don't "john" me. it's a birthday gift !

TG : isn't his birthday in like

TG : two weeks

EB : jeez you know his birthday, you really care about him right ?

TG : nope, this information totally fell accidentally on me and grabbed one of my brain cell and don't wanna leave

EB : if you say so

TG : don't change the subject egbert, i'm doing the brotherly disapproval behind my sweet shades

EB : duh ! it's just an early gift ! why does it matter so much ?

TG : you offer me shades or movies. shitty movies, by the way

EB : would you have preferred a computer rather than your shades ?  
EB : and you like shitty movies for your ironic persona

EB : and don't make me believe you wouldn't have tried to smack me with your katana if i even just talked about buying you a computer !!

TG : ...okay mister the judge, this is an acceptable argumentation

TG : but the point is, you spoil him a bit too much, egbert

EB : nah, you're overreacting !

TG : I start to believe this like, in egberts's DNA to try to spoil people

TG : you and your dad tried to do the same with me

TG : for a bit i would have felt like a fucking princess

TG : but thanks no sir, dave strider isn't a damn princess waiting in her tower and counting her hair

TG : i'm a freaking knight

EB : sure, knight dave

TG : dirk seems to be interested by the princess's role thought, so be careful

TG : stop fucking spoiling him

EB : okay okay ! i got it ! geez

EB : you're maybe not a princess but you can be such a drama queen sometimes

TG : sweet

EB : *rolls eyes*

TG : i can't thought, it would ruin nepeta's most beautiful yaoi OTP

EB : OH MY GOD DAVE NO

TG : watch me dude

 

=======================================================

TG : hey is my bro still over there

EB : yea. he's been here for a couple days now ?

EB : it's not a big deal he's pretty chill.

EB : but. you want him back or ?

TG : what the hell is he doing

EB : right now ? he's in the pool

TG : …  
TG : you have a pool

EB : yea i'm bringing him snacks right now

EB : why

TG : oh my fucking god

TG : okay first

TG : since when do you have a pool

EB : well it's ready for two days now !

EB : that's why dirk is here in the first place

EB : we started building it like... 2,3 months ago

TG : dude you live in a fucking freezing ass-and-balls country

TG : and you build a POOL

EB : jeez for who are you taking us ?

TG : don't even get me started here

EB : it's, you know, these pools kept warm ? because covered and all

TG : oh god

TG : why the fuck did you build it in the first place

EB : well dirk mentioned he liked swimming

EB : and

EB : fuck shit i mean

TG : ...

EB : no i formulated it bad !

TG : did you buy a damn WARMED POOL for my brother

EB : no !

EB : i mean !

EB : i use it too !

TG : your defense is pathetic. you know this right ?

EB : DX

TG : dude when i told you to slow down with the gifts for dirk

EB : it isn't a gift for him !!

TG : what i was meaning certainly wasn't "go ahead and buy him MORE and MORE EXPENSIVE gifts !"

TG : i'm pretty sure this wasn't the whole purpose of what i said

EB : come on, he just talked about it and i thought it would be a good idea ! my dad approved too

TG : ...

EB : dave, i'm not spoiling him !

TG : you totally are and you don't even realize it, and that's all i have to say on the matter

EB : raaaaaaaah i'm noooooooot !

TG : sure

EB : >:B

 

 

====================================================================

"Wow, I can really have them ?"

 

In awe, Dirk was moving his hands to get a better sight of the gloves. In true black leather, letting escape his fingers freely as his old ones, but unlike them they had each a small, cute unicorn sewed on the back of the hand. They were just perfect. Ironically, literally perfect.

 

The sound of John's giggle drew him out of his reverie.

"Of course silly ! Who else would wear them anyway ? And your others started to get really worned out, right ?"

 

"You noticed..."

 

"Hm ?"

 

"Nothing. Thank you, John."

He even granted the other with a smile - small, but a smile still.

 

"Just one thing... don't tell your brother. He gonna make a fuss about it otherwise."

The older one rose his hand to scratch his scalp in an embarrassed manner.

 

A gesture Dirk was finding truly adorable, if he was honest.

And if he was really, totally honest (he could, he was in his own mind after all) the blonde was crushing quite hard on John.

 

Like, a lot.

 

It wasn't for all the gifts, thought Dirk appreciated a bit to be spoiled like this. His mother couldn't really, and of course you couldn't expect such behavior from Bro, knowing the guy.

 

And Dave was nearly counting each bit of money.

 

So, yeah, it was nice to receive gifts. _And cakes_.

Bless John's dad.

 

But no, it wasn't what made Dirk fall in love - because yes, better admit it, it was love at this rate - with the airhead, kind young man.

 

It was only, how he was. Gentle. Honest. Caring. Funny.

God he couldn't even stop if he started.

The blonde even liked his shitty movies tastes and his pranks.

He was so doomed.

 

Of course the adolescent heard more than once the "no homo" speech of John, and he was younger than him... But he wasn't losing hope. Not yet.

Dirk kept thinking if he acted clever enough, he could get the guy to like him. It was just a matter of time and perfect schemes.

 

 

 

 

 

=========================================================

 

It was a soft knock at the door that finally woke up John. Th eyoung man sit on his bed, wondering how such slight sound was able to brought him back from his slumber, but a sudden flash of light, followed by a cracking, loud noise, answered him.

 

Thunder.

 

The knock made itself heard again, and John focus went back to his door.  
"Yes ?"

He asked, voice loud enough to cover the lapping of the rain, but not too strong so he wouldn't bother the other residents of the house.

 

Even if the thunder probably woke everyone already.

 

"John ? Can I enter ?"

It was Dirk voice. Dave left for a once-in-forever trip in order to see a concert, non ironically. He went with Terezi, Vriska and Karkat, John declining for various reasons (the first one being he didn't like the band, the second that Vriska was his Ex-girlfriend).

Instead of letting the youngest Strider alone, the brunette offered him to stay at the Egbert's house the time Dave's was away.

 

The adolescent accepted right away.

 

That was how they ended like this, Dirk at his room's door in the middle of the night, with the roar of thunder outside.

In a way, John was pretty happy he asked the other to stay. Otherwise the poor guy would have found himself alone at the small apartment the two brothers shared.

 

"Sure Dirk, go ahead."

Shyly, the door opened, and the frame of the blonde showed up in the darkness of the room, visible just a second thanks to a lightning.  
John turned on the lamp on his nightstand, rubbing his eye with a yawn. He could only see the other in a blurry manner, his glasses let aside.

 

Bu the still noticed the way the youngest's attitude was... Hesitant ?

"What's happened ? Scared of thunder ?"

Honestly, it was said as a joke, but the lack of response made John reconsider. Was Dirk really afraid ?

 

"Can I sleep with you ?"

The mutter was just strong enough for John to hear it, and confirmed his thoughts.

The adolescent was standing in his room, and he suddenly realized he wasn't wearing his shades. Curiously, the brunette always thought the Striders were like, _sleeping_ with their glasses. Looked like no.

 

"If it bothers you it's okay, I can go back to my room."

 

Some could be surprised to hear the younger one use the possessive form, but seeing how much time he spent in the Egbert's house it was close to the truth.

In front of the long silence, Dirk started to step out of the room, shoulders dropped.

 

"Wait no, it's okay. Come here."

 

Still stuck a bit in layers of sleep, John however came with the conclusion he couldn't let his friend sleep alone if he was afraid of thunder. It was not only rude, but even cruel for the poor boy.

He moved his hand in a "come here" motion, pushing his sheets away to invite the other.

 

Dirk didn't hesitate this time, and joined his elder in bed, who then turned of the light. He was at a respectable distance at first, but the thunder roared violently outside, and he nearly jumped in John's arms, ho bit his lips to not giggle. Honestly, it was quite cute - the blonde always seemed to maintain his strong I-don't-need-help persona, seeing him like was... Yeah, adorable.

He gently wrapped his arms around the younger's frame, their bodies not stuck against each other but close enough to feel the warmth emanating from them.

Sleep slowly got him again, his breath falling in his calm steady pace.

 

===> Be Dirk

 

There was no way in the world Dirk could sleep right now. And it was not because of the thunder, thank you very much - he cared about it as much as he cared about apple juice. No, the reason why slumber was fleeing him was rather dark-haired and blue-eyed, and currently gently hugging him in his sleep.

 

Honestly, he wasn't proud of himself. Lying to John, even if he didn't _say_ he was afraid if thunder, bugged him a bit. The blonde let his _friend_ believe he was, so he could sneak in his bed.

 

Bad Dirk, really bad.

 

Okay but right now he could hardly care, in John's arms, in John's bed.

It wasn't entirely his fault anyway. Getting the brunette's heart was a bit of a hard work, and he couldn't really tell it was progressing well. Or even progressing at all.

 

So when the idea popped in his mind, Dirk only turned it a little moment in his mind because surrendering and walking to John's room. He didn't even have to lie to the man, who right away guessed he was afraid (thought if it was an act).

 

The blond even let his shades away, counting on their absence to add some "shy and fragile" points to his act.

 

But it worthed it, thousand time worthed it.

It was hard to resist the temptation, but since it was more than what he got in month, Dirk would deal with it and be patient more.

 

Determined, he settled himself more comfortably and tried to sleep.

 

===========================================================

 

"Hoy blondie. We need to talk."

 

Behind his shades, Dirk's eyes rolled. Really, Dave was the king of ridiculous nicknames. Most of the time he didn't care, but the tension was often strong between them, and as little as it was the names were getting on the younger's nerves sometimes.

 

"Whad'ya want."

He groaned, his eyes not leaving the screen of his laptop to grant his brother with his gaze.  
So he couldn't see the annoyed glance Dave gave to the machine, but he perfectly knew the guy disliked the fact John offered him such expensive present, birthday or not.

 

Why exactly, was a thing Dirk wasn't sure of.

 

Not letting the unfriendly attitude of the adolescent (when was friendly anyway ? Dave's answer is : Never) bothering him, he dropped his body on the couch next to the other, making sure to make him bounce and grab his computer in panic, before shooting him a death glare.

 

Would have he not been Dave Strider, he certainly would have beamed a smile.

But he was, so he just gave himself mental sap on the back.

 

With a sigh, Dirk closed his computer, according his attention to his brother.

"Shoot it dude, don't leave a guy hangin'."

 

Dave put his auto-congratulation to the side, getting back to serious business mode.

"I'll be simple."

 

"I'd appreciate that."

 

"What the fuck are you doing with John ?"

Blonde eyebrows rose above anime shades, otherwise Dirk stayed perfectly still.

"I don't get what you mean."

Even his voice was perfectly neutral, but a twitch shook the corner of the older's mouth.

 

"I get you like his house. This shitty apartment has the size of a rabbit hole, and not the luxury size one. But fuck, you spend your _life_ there, I'm barely exaggerating. And I don't talk about how you look at him, god for a bit you'd be drooling all over him. I swear I can see you with a fucking shaking tail and whimpering for a pet on the head."

 

This time Dirk couldn't totally contain his blush. He knew his brother enough now to understand it was a fact he confirmed through several observations, not just a random idea.

 

"Let's admit. And ? It isn't your business."

 

Decided to close here the conversation, the blonde reached for his computer, but a hand grabbed his wrist right away and he was forced to look at his brother again.

"His my best friend, you're my little brother. It can hardly be _more_ my business actually."

 

Dirk gritted his tooth in annoyance, his voice rising slightly.

"Then _why_ do you care ?! It's not like I'm going to hurt him, and it's not like you _care_ about _me_ !"

 

Without restrain, he violently pushed Dave away, grabbing his computer and bag before leaving the apartment like a tornado.

 

"...I'm worried _he_ would hurt _you_ , stupid."

The older blonde sighed in the empty room.

 

===============================================================

 

TG : Strider to Egbert, Strider to Egbert

TG : this is Serious Business Meeting time, get your ass over there

EB : hi dave ! :B

TG : god aren't you too old for this smiley

EB : did you summon the SBM for talking about my smileys, dave ?

TG : in fact no, but I'll summon another for that later.

TG : is my brother at your house

TG : (again)

EB : of course not dave ! he's working today, you forgot ?

TG : How could i know he doesn't tell me shit

EB : he put his working hours on a paper on your fridge

TG : how the fuck do you know that

EB : he did the same on our fridge

EB : the fact that _you_ don't know that is more worrying than me knowing it, actually !

TG : whatever this isn't the purpose of the meeting stop changing the subject.

EB : i'm not !

TG : shush Egbert

TG : SBM summoning, remember

EB : *rolls eyes*

TG : I'll exceptionally forgive you this unacceptable behavior because i'm a nice guy

TG : do you get what serious means, egbert

TG : no time for shit

EB : and no time for rambles...

TG : exactly

TG : oh

TG : okay you got me

EB : hehe

EB : okay but what is it really, you're getting me a bit worried

TG : you don't really have to be worried it's just

TG : dirk really spend an awfully big amount of time at your house, you know

EB : aw, you're jealous ?

TG : egbert i'm talking, shut your trap

EB : my mouth is perfectly closed you know ?

TG : dude

EB : jeez fine

EB : he doesn't bother us you know ? he's cool

TG : of course he's cool he shares some DNA with me

TG : but that doesn't matter right now

TG : what matter is the fact

TG : why do you think he comes so often at your place ?

EB : cakes ? you ? pool ?

EB : my awesomeness ? :D

TG : i think the latter is pretty close in fact

EB : what ?!

TG : i mean except you're an awesome _dork_ but

TG : yeah, basically he comes often because of you

EB : aw, well he likes me that's nice ! he's a good friend :B

EB : wow hehe now i think about it your sentence can have a really dirty meaning !

TG : to be honest you can take it in this sense too

EB : what ?

TG : i'm sharing a small apartment with the dude

TG : this is the type of information that accidentally comes to my knowledge

EB : ...why are you telling me this

EB : i won't be able to look at him in the eyes now ! Dx

EB : well, in the shades

TG : because

TG : you're still no homo as fuck right ?

EB : of course !!

EB : why you even ask ?!

TG : we never know

TG : anyway, the kid has a serious crush on you

TG : and if you keep being all nice and super-friendly as only dorks like you know to be

TG : he'll keep having his hopes high

EB : you think so ?

TG : put yourself in his shoes

TG : a guy he likes, being kind with him, not having a girlfriend, giving him gifts...

TG : he would be a girl i'd believe you're already head over heels for him

TG : but you aren't, right ?

EB : no !!

EB : i mean i like him but

EB : like a friend ! or a little brother !

TG : then cut ties harsh

TG : otherwise he'll keep hoping after you

EB : and what if i just have a conversation with him ?

EB : he's clever, he can understand

TG : it sounds like you don't want to send him away, dude

EB : he's a friend !

TG : he knows you're not into dudes

TG : "conversation" won't do shit

EB : ... i guess you're right

TG : i always am

EB : i'll talk to him

TG : be firm

TG : you're a man, you're the adult here

EB : got it !

 

Dave dropped his back against the couch, sighing. His hands slid under his shades, rubbing his eyes.

He knew he did the right thing.

He knew it.

But fuck if he didn't feel guilty right now.

 

====================================================================

 

The sound of the door opening made John jump on his place on the couch, stress growing considerably.

It wasn't his Dad, easily guessing from both the hour and the nature of the noise - his Dad opened with more calm and less energy...

 

The young man shook his head, and looked at the opening of the hall, that soon Dirk crossed, offering him a small smile.

 

"Hi, John."

As such-called swallowed hardly, not answering, his small shivered to disappear, worry filling his expression instead.

"John ? You're okay ?"

 

Unable to answer right away, the dark-haired boy sighed heavily, patting the space next to him instead.

Dirk sat, all his body tensed in front f such unusual behavior.

 

It required a deep breath, but then John was able to sit right, face in a serious expression.

Now it was Dirk's turn to swallow. All his instincts was yelling this situation wasn't good. His mind checked quickly all his recent actions, but nothing wrong came from it. He did no mistakes. So what..?

 

"We need to talk. About you. About... us."

It was like the air in the room changed into ice, Dirk was having hard time to breath, his heart pounding painfully in his chest. Nothing in John's attitude let him believe this conversation could turn how he hoped it to.

 

With no other choices, Dirk nodded, feeling like a rusted robot trying to move.

 

"Are you... God I'm sorry if I'm wrong but, are you like, liking me ?"

John was working hard to stay focused, but really he was so nervous.

"More than a friend, I mean."

 

His hands were strangling each other to prevent his fingers to twitch and move.

 

Dirk barely moved. Seeing how the dialogue started, he wasn't that surprised about the outcome but.

The thing was, John never suspected anything. He never suggested he did, never acted in a way or another... And seeing how nervous he was suddenly, the blonde couldn't believe the realization just hit him like that like a fucking ascension.

 

So it let only one solution.

 

"Who told you ?"

For a second, Dirk was proud of himself for succeeding in letting the words leave his mouth despite it being more dry than the fucking Sahara and his throat more closed than the National Bank.

However his mind quickly came back on the present situation, observing John's reaction.

 

And witnessing the sudden jolt, followed by the guy blushing and looking away, seeming highly embarrassed, it confirmed Dirk's doubt. From that, it wasn't that hard to guess what name was about to be pronounced.

 

And indeed, after another sight John answered.

"Dave."

 

The brunette was fast on standing up for his best bro, of course.  
"He had to tell me ! I'm really oblivious of this sort of things, you know... And he-"

 

"It wasn't his job to tell you."

This time, it was through clenched teeth the words were said.

 

"Dirk..."

John's hand passed in his own hair, messing the dark bangs.

"He's right thought. You can't stay around me so much. It's bad for you."

His voice was trying to reach his serious, fatherly tone, with very relative success.

 

The adolescent's face rose in one go, choc spreading freely on it without any attempt from him to hide it.

"Wh-what ?"

 

"I can't return your feelings. And if you stay with me you won't be able to forget me easily, do you understand ?"

It was hard for John too, knowing he was hurting his friend. His heart clenched painfully.

 

But abruptly, it wasn't pain or sadness anymore over Dirk's face.

 

It was absolute _anger_.

 

"I told him it wasn't his fucking business..."

The voice was like a dangerous whistle, filled with hatred.

 

"Dirk, he was just trying to-"

"To fuck up my life more ? Well, he did a pretty good job ! Now I'm not allowed to see you. How great !"

 

Desperation started to sink in John, who looked for the right words to calm his younger counterpart. The relationship between the two brothers was bad enough like that, it didn't need to get worse ! And certainly not because of him.

 

"I won't forgive him this time. I swear to god I'll make him _pay_."

 

Jumping on his feet, the blonde grabbed his bag in order to leave, only to have John suddenly embracing him from behind.

 

"Please, don't do that !"

Really, John's throat was tight. The conversation really went bad, and it was his fault.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you it was your brother..."

 

"I would have guessed anyway. Who else dislike me enough to lead you to push me away ?"

The sadness was back in Dirk's voice, and it increased the brunette's guilt.

 

"I just don't want you to suffer. I-I'm not gay, okay ?"

 

"I know."

 

"I can't answer your feelings."

 

"I. Know."

 

"So you must forget about me, you understand ?"

The blonde sighed, relaxing into John's arms. The guy was few inches taller than him, and when Dirk turned around to face him, removing his shades, he had to look up to gaze at him in the eyes.

 

"I know all this already, John. Do you think I'm stupid ?"

Gold eyes met blue ones, and the latest blinked.

 

"No, of course not but..."

 

"I'm not thinking your kindness hide feelings, or lying to myself and pretending you're denying your love for me or some bullshit like this. Got it."

 

John gulped, then nodded.

 

"Can you free me now ?"

"Oh... Oh !! Shit sorry, yeah !"

 

The older jumped away, before scratching his scalp with an embarrassed chuckle.

"Sorry."

 

"It's okay. Now we cleared everything, are you still going to force me to. Leave ?"

Dirk planned to say this sentence in a neutral tone, but he couldn't help the break in his words.

 

Biting his lips, the brunette was obviously hesitant.  
But, finally, he surrendered.

"No."

 

Smile rested on his lips again, and Dirk felt the knot in his stomach relax a little.

"We'll just, slow down a bit ? Like, you don't come here nearly everyday and you try to spend time at your apartment when he is."

 

The blonde didn't answer right away, silently enjoying the worry that showed up once more on John's face.

 

"Okay."

In his relief, the brunette sighed.

"Good ! Now you're here thought, I have this movie I wanted to show you ! It's great and..."

 

Dirk smiled softly at the visible enthusiasm, following the other on the couch.

 

=================================================================

 

Dave wasn't stupid, he perfectly noticed that if the visits calmed down, the two boys were still very close. If he ever doubted, the smug grin his brother granted him with sometimes was chasing any uncertainty that could have clouded his mind.

 

But he decided to not attempt to break them apart anymore, further since each time he tried to mention the subject, John was escaping more fast than a soap covered with butter.

 

At least it brought Dirk in a lighter mood, making him more easy to talk with and get along - as long as they didn't talk about John.

 

Honestly, the blonde wondered what pushed him to be so determined after the egderp. Not he was lacking of good points, Dave didn't chose his best bros among crap, thank you very much.

 

But an older, no-homo-focused and oblivious dork like him as a person to court ?

 

Dave could only wish him good luck, he'd need it.

 

================================================================

 

What.

 

What in the actual fuck.

 

Did Dave opened a door towards another dimension instead the inoffensive one of the Egbert's house ?

 

Was it like, one of this opposed-mirror world were everything is different ?

 

Like hit by the thunder, the blonde was standing in the opening of the living-room, watching eyes wide behind his shades the couch.

Or rather, who was on the couch.

More specifically, the fucking position they were in.

 

Because if he wasn't one to point out some sort of behavior (or only friendly or towards assholes), he couldn't _not_ notice the way Dirk was currently half lying on John, who placed his arm on the blonde's hips for more comfort.

 

What the fuck, really. Even he wouldn't be able to settle like this against the brunette, not without having a 'no homo speech' at least, and he was _his best bro_.

 

And here was this mini-Bro being all cuddly with John not minding at all, and the fact he was watching one of his favorite movie (thanks to John, Dave was now knowing all Con Air's sentence nearly by heart) wasn't an excuse.

 

If Dirk accepted to watch Con Air, it sure gave him some points in John's gaze, but it shouldn't be enough to allow him such. Closeness.

 

While all these thoughts were rushing into the older blonde's mind, his brother suddenly noticed his presence. And despite the shades on on both sides, Dave could nearly tell what he was mentally saying.

 

Probably something like :

" _Mention only one word about gay or homo and you're dead to me._ "

 

The temptation was real, and he struggled a bit, Dirk's eyebrow even frowning to add at his threat.

But finally, Dave was sort of impressed by his brother work - getting John to "gay-cuddle" was a piece of art in itself, and as a mark of respect he decided to let it slide this time.

He just flashstepped into John's room, taking the shit he forgot (he could have asked Dirk but he never knew when he would come back and it was urgent matter) then walked out of the house without his best bro even noticing his presence.

 

Dirk was owing him one.

 

=====================================================================

 

It was annoying, but John just couldn't stop staring. He should give his whole attention to the public, but he kept being distracted.

 

_Why Roxanne wasn't doing anything ?!_

The brunette was nearly at the end of his show, and he just couldn't focus.

 

At the bar, Dirk was sipping his without-alcohol drink, and a moment ago a man sit next to him, engaging conversation.

 _And not the blonde, nor Roxanne, pushed him away_ _!!_

 

Gathering his last pieces of concentration, John ended the show quickly, smiling the best he could while bowing to the crowd and applause. But his grin was a little strained despite his efforts.

 

Not waiting anymore, he joined his friend, sitting on the other side of him, glancing at the shameless man while passing by. God, he was certainly way older than Dirk !

 

"Jeez, that was exhausting !"

The shout was a bit more loud than his usual level of voice, half in purpose. But it got the effect to bring back the adolescent's gaze on him, to his satisfaction.

 

"That much ? I thought you were an accomplished comedian and all."

His was wearing a light, gently mocking grin, and John relaxed.

Not for long thought, because the man grabbed the blonde's attention again. What the fuck was wrong with this guy ? He was a _guy_ , to begin with !

 

_But Dirk was gay._

 

Dirk was still a minor !

 

_But not for that long._

 

And the stranger was probably twice his age !

 

_But Dirk kind of liked older guys, it seemed._

 

Losing the fight against his own damn mind, John let his head drop on his arms with a painful groan.

 

This had the advantage to draw the blonde from his conversation thought, and he placed a hand on his shoulder, voice full of concern.

 

"John ? Are you okay ?"

The brunette shook his head lightly, not even feeling guilty of his little lie - he _was_ not okay after all !

Just, the cause of his 'illness' was probably not what Dirk imagined.

 

"Do you want us to go home ?"

"Yes please..."

He whined, giving him his best tearing gaze.

Right away, the adolescent hailed Roxanne, explaining the situation to her, before circling John's waist with one arm to support him.

The stranger tried vaguely to get Dirk's attention, or probably his phone number. But it was useless ; all his focus was on John.

Who could heard the annoyed curse from the guy while they were leaving, and grinned discreetly when he was sure the boy helping him couldn't see it.

 

What he didn't know, was that Dirk's face showed the same smug smile.

 

=====================================================

 

Dirk was quite satisfied. Of course he wasn't officially going out with John, far from it. But his plan was progressing smoothly, Dave wasn't trying to obstruct his actions and he was at the Egbert's like at home.

 

About John, the two of them really got close. In top of movie sessions, the young man sometimes invited him to restaurant (because he didn't have the occasion to go by himself) or cinema (a true piece of art need to be appreciated on big screen !), and other hang out that _could_ be considered as friendly... Only by someone like John.

 

It wasn't a problem for the blonde, honestly. Only his libido was complaining, because otherwise he received cuddles, nap together and other cute shit like that. He had to be careful about the womens that manifested some interest to the brunette, but it wasn't hard to get John showing such tender care to him it quickly discouraged whoever was feeling like hitting on the comedian.

 

For his 18th birthday, the older boy offered him a fucking beautiful katana, not the cheap shit. A real, well-made, shiny and sharp (and expensive) piece of art.

Dirk swooned so bad. He right away jumped into John's arms, smooching noisily all over his face (avoiding the lips, but sometimes landing on the corner of them by "accident") and the brunette only laughed at his enthusiasm, pleased to have made him so happy.

 

Because yes, Dirk's happiness seemed to have become on the three top aims of Egbert's life. That was translated by gifts, these hangouts he mentioned, and every stupid thing he could say out loud and that landed into John's ears.

 

It seemed like the brunette was missing to have someone to spoil, and since Dave rejected every gifts except at his birthday, John switched all his needs of spoiling on him.

 

He literally was a sugar daddy for him, minus the sex part. But Dirk intended to change that, he just needed to be more patient.

 

And act a bit aggressive.

 

==================================================================

 

TG : sup

EB : hi dave ! :B

TG : i could ask you where is my brother, and you could either guiltily admit he's at your house, or try to change the subject, or even lie to me

TG : but i know hes at your house, so lets forget the foreplay

EB : ...

EB : we planned this weeks ago ! i had a new movie and hes the only one watching these with me !!

TG : keeping going with your mental boner for niccage ?

EB : NO !!!

TG : anyway

TG : youre on your phone while a movie ? did you hit your head ?

EB : no the movie is finished now

EB : it was a masterpiece

TG : i dont doubt it Egbert

TG : a master-horseshit-piece

EB : rude !

TG : and my brother is still there because...?

EB : he wanted to work right away on some coding, i couldn't just throw him out and say he had to do it at his own home !

TG : thats exactly what you should have said

EB : its impolite !

TG : hes the impolite shell stuck on your ship

TG : but whatever

TG : i abandoned the idea of you acting like a man a long time ago

TG : when i met you in fact

TG : lets be real i never even had this idea in the first place

EB : what do you want ?

EB : i mean except insulting my manliness

TG : you know how much i like your lack of manliness dude

TG : dudette

EB : stop

TG : how to cut a guy in his fun

TG : rude miss

EB : dave i swear to god

TG : okay okay calm your tits

TG : we settled youre not a girl

EB : last time i checked, my package why still here, yeah

TG : so do you realise you act like a fucking swooning lady over here ?

TG : all MILF light on full bright red egbert

TG : or more like

TG : daddy light

TG : but i fear you flipping your shit

EB : i am not flipping my shit !

EB : but what are you saying that ? im not doing that at all !

TG : someone is in denytown

EB : dirk and me are just friends !!!

TG : john

TG : youre my best bro and i need to be harsh with you

TG : you look head over heels for him

TG : pure truth

EB : ...

EB :is it a new way to convince me to push him away ?!

EB : this isn't fun dave !

TG : dude seriously

EB : im leaving

TG : wait john

 

ectoBiologist ceased pestering turntechGodhead

 

TG : what a fucking stubborn deep-in-sand head

 

================================================================

 

A heavy sigh escaped John's lips. When it wasn't Dave, it was Rose who tried to suggest him he was seeing the youngest blonde like something else than friend.

She said exactly the same about him and Dave, and he still wasn't and doesn't wanting to go out with him !

 

Lying on his bed, eyes watching the ceiling aimlessly, the brunette was letting his mind wander. He disliked all these gossiping and pushover about his relationship with Dirk.

 

He just cared about him a lot, like for Dave. They weren't best bro, but he still was one of his best friend. Nothing to add at this.

 

Soon, Dirk would find a boyfriend, him would get a pretty girlfriend and everything would be fine. They would stop arguing on his feelings for the blonde.

 

 _Friendly_ feelings.

 

Maybe he should work on getting one ? The comedian didn't really try to find someone recently. For some reason, he didn't feel the need to... But it sounded nice. Having someone to cherish, cuddle...

 

The sudden sound of his ghostbuster ringtone made him jump out of his skin. Quickly thought, John answered, a smile quickly forming at the voice - he didn't took the time to check on the screen who was calling.

 

"Hi John !!"

 

"Jade ! How are you ?"

His earlier rage was just a fading memory, as he enjoying his cousin's chatting. However, he ended telling her about all this attack from his supposed friends.

 

"Aw, I'm sorry to hear that John ! If you say you don' t love Dirk, I believe you !"

"Thank you Jade. I have at least one support."

"Does Dirk think you love him ?"

 

The conversation... Was somehow unpleasant. John tried to shake the feeling, but it persisted.

 

"Nah, we talked about this ! He knows I'm straight."

"Okay, good then."

 

"And you know what ? I'm planning to get myself a girlfriend. So they'll see they were wrong."

"Hum, isn't it a mean reason to start going out...?"

"Jeez Jade, I'll go out with someone I _like_ , this isn't just for that. I realized I'd like to have someone to spend time with, watch movie and cuddles. And kiss."

 

"Aw, that means you won't do that anymore with Dirk ? Apart the kiss part, since you weren't doing it !"

 

John's throat tightened.

"What do you mean ?"

"Well, cuddles and all, you do that with Dirk..."

"No !"

"But ? The last time you discussed with me about him curling at your side and snuggling to you, and how cute he was !"

 

Blushing, he couldn't deny. He _did_ have this conversation, because with Jade it was easy to let himself fall and being all enthusiastic over stupid things.

 

Like Dirk's cuteness.

 

"I was saying this like about a kitty, it's nothing about romantic feelings !!"

 

If Jade was joining the dark side with Rose and Dave, he wouldn't survive this.

 

"That's not what I mean ! I'm just saying that if you have a girlfriend, you'll have to spend nearly all your time with her and very few with Dirk. And you won't be able to cuddle with him as much as you do right now, because she would be jealous."

 

It was like a fist in his stomach. She was right of course, having a girlfriend takes time, he wouldn't be able to spend time with the blond like he was doing these last months.

 

Wouldn't it be ideal, thought. Best way to gently push him away, like Dave asked.

 

But...

But he didn't want to.

 

The brunette wished to continue his relationship with Dirk like this. The idea of having a girl complaining about how much time he would spend with his friend was... Annoying.

 

But it was right, he was _supposed_ to spend time with his girlfriend. Supposed to _want_ to spend time with her, and not with a boy, no matter how funny, adorable and handsome he was...

 

"John ?"

 

Oh god.

 

"S-sorry I need to leave."

"John ?! Are you o-" *bip*

 

With a loud sound, the brunette let his body fall on the floor, his mind overwhelmed.

 

All his thoughts could be resumed by :

"I'm so doomed."

 

===================================================================

For what was like the thousandth time since the start of the movie, Dirk glanced at his couch's neighbor.

 

From the beginning, he could nearly see the dark aura around John, like black clouds heavy with thunder ready to explode.

 

It was a rare thing, the brunette was always so happy despite everything, always the one cheering up the others. Comforting Dirk when he fought his brother.

 

But the blonde wasn't good at that. It was John's skill, not his... However, he was worried. He couldn't let the other like this, right ?

 

"John ?"

Honestly, the noise that answered him, more close to a short dog's growl than a real human sound, nearly succeeded to make him retreat.

 

But he was a Strider, a Strider faced the danger !

 

"Are you okay...?"

Dirk worked hard for his voice to not flicker, but it was a moderate success.

 

This time, the question made the brunette turn his gaze away from the TV to look at him, and the adolescent gulped audibly.

 

The eyes, usually blue like a calm sky, were more of a threatening storm right now... Or was it only a feel ? Anyway, Dirk wasn't reassured at all. His instincts were all on red lights.

 

"We need to talk."

 

Oh god, the lights just went from red to fucking-rainbow-fluo-flashing alert mode.

 

"I listen."

He answered in a careful way, as if John was a wild beast right now, and any show of aggressiveness would make him go crazy.

 

But the comedian didn't seem to really heard his words anyway, he probably could have said "banana" and get the same result.

 

"You need to spend less time here. Seriously Dirk, you're spend more than half your time in my house !"

 

Dirk frowned. Of course he spent a hell of a lot of time here, they were both aware of that. What was the point ? Dave even lectured John about it, and it didn't change anything.

 

What happened that _now_ it was suddenly a big deal ?

 

"... I know ? I think you. Were okay with me here ?"

He didn't even try to hide the slight pain in his voice, the reject in John's words stinging.

 

"It's not really that I'm not okay..."

A heavy sigh escaped the older boy, who looked terribly bothered, like struggling in an internal fight.

 

Only, Dirk didn't know what was the purpose of this fight, neither how to make things go his way.

 

The sudden look of determination on the brunette's face made him shiver, heart pounding in worry.

 

"When you're here, I have to spend time with you. Because you're my _friend_ , and it's not polite otherwise."

 

Did Dirk imagine the emphasize on the word 'friend' ? He didn't think so.

 

"It means I can't do things, like meeting people !"

In a burst of frustration, the young man was making big gestures with his hands, and the blonde could only stare in disbelief and a rising despair.

His gaze became even more serious.

"When I'll get a girlfriend, I'll have to spend time with her, and more than with you - and right now it's not possible !"

 

He was quite agitated, but somehow relieved to have successfully expressed his point.

 

Dirk, on the other hand, was completely still, like he got struck by thunder. He was right, it was a storm in John's eyes, and the lightning just hit him right in the heart.

 

With deep desperation, his mind went through all the recent events, looking for when he fucked up. The blonde certainly did something for the things to turn out that way, right ?

But he found nothing.

 

"You found a girl you like ?"

He finally mustered the strength to say, his throat feeling like someone just stick a sword through it.

 

With a slight blush showing up on his cheeks, John avoided his eyes.

"Not yet. But it's just a matter of time."

 

A hysterical laugh nearly escaped Dirk at this. _Just a matter of time_. That was exactly what he thought about him and John. That he, _they_ needed just some fucking _time_.

 

"Why suddenly ?"

He still didn't understand. It seemed to have popped out of nowhere.

 

"Well, things with Dave got better, you don't need to spend so much time here. And I'm alone for a long time now, I want to find someone to go out with."

 

What the fuck. That made no sense, the brunette never showed any care about that, even the day just before.

 

He didn't know what to do. No plan, no schemes, nothing but his heart hurting like it was bleeding all his blood out, each pulse giving more pain than the last one.

 

It was too much.

 

Not caring anymore about fucking Strider pride, or to look strong, or whatever shit, Dirk removed his shades to rub the tears forming at the corners of his eyes.

 

For a second, he hated John for making him look so pathetic. But that changed nothing - he still loved the fucking douche.

 

"Dirk..."

 

It was a sudden respite in the storm, blue eyes lightening for being filled with worry and guilt.

Unable to resist that voice, the blonde faced his personal hell, looking at the loved blue eyes while letting few tears roll on his cheeks and hating each of them.

 

"Why" ?  
He mouthed in a breath, not able to speak more.

 

At this right moment, for less than a second, something crossed John's gaze.

Something that wasn't guilt, worry or anything he saw until now.

Something he was hoping to see for _months_ , in vain, and for the spawn of a nanosecond _was there_.

 

His heart truly missed a beat, all his various feelings turning into a mad, burning hope.

 

But as fast as it appeared, the sparkle vanished, replaced with guilt, horror, then highest determination.

 

And finally, Dirk understood.

He knew what made John pushing him away all of sudden, wanting to get a girlfriend and all that shit.

The blonde could have laughed... If he wasn't so fucking pissed off.

 

Taking a deep breath to calm down, he closed his eyes for a second, before opening them again, determination matching John's.

His body moved on the couch, bringing him closer to the comedian, who showed now more fear than anything else, confirming Dirk's hypothesis.

 

The closest he could get, when he felt John would abscond the fuck out if he moved one inch closer, Dirk stopped. His gaze not leaving the other's, he spoke.

 

"John. I know why you're doing this."

His voice was calm, soothing, but panic still flashed in the blue eyes.

 

"I-I explained everything. There's nothing more."

His words were rushed out, filled with fear.

 

"You don't have to afraid..."

His tone dropped for a gentle one, Dirk once again in the skin of someone trying to tame a wild beast.

 

"I am not afraid !"

Like hell he wasn't. The blonde smiled, as kindly as he could, and John growled.

Fear, anger, despair, guilt and shame. Everything was mixing and struggling in the comedian, and he looked about to explode.

 

His words were doing nothing to calm him, so Dirk tried something else. His face became resolute again, not allowing the blue eyes to avoid him.

 

"John."

_Shiver._

"I love you."

 

Blue eyes widened, panic wining over all other emotions, before sharing half the space with anger and desperation.

 

"I AM NOT HOMOSEXUAL, FOR FUCK'S SAKE !!!"

 

"Who _cares_ ?"

The adolescent whispered with passion, contrasting with John's outburst.

 

" _I_ CARE !"

It was the Egbert's turn to feel tears forming, his breath harsh and fast, his mind and heart like a devastated battlefield.

 

"I know you're not. Liking me doesn't mean..."

 

"I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU !"

He purely yelled this time, and Dirk flinched, his mouth twisting at that. It hurt, badly.

His teeth clenched.

 

"Calm down, I'm just trying to say..."

 

"We're _friends_ , and that's all we'll ever be ! I told you to not get your hopes up, I told you I would _never_ return your feelings !!! I-DON'T-LOVE-YOU !"

He hammered, voice getting high.

 

Dirk's face dropped. This time, it was too much. He had enough.

 

"Oh you don't ?"

His tone of voice, cold, cut the comedian in his fury, and he looked at him, confused.

 

"You spend all your free time with me. When I'm not coming here myself, it's _you_ who call me there, under silly excuses like watching a movie or just chilll I know because I tried, John. I tried not coming for a certain amount time, and you always call me back."

 

His voice was turning into a threatening growl, the blonde containing his rage while not leaving one moment the blue eyes. John was trembling, his mouth opening to protest but he didn't let him.

 

"You cuddle with me, you kiss me, you nap with me, _you fucking let me slept in your bed_."

 

"You were afraid of storm ! I just-"

The gaze he received cut the brunette right in his sentence.

 

"We hang out more than friends do, you see me more than you see your _best bro_ , you cover me in gifts - what shows that you think of me nearly all the fucking time, _everyone you'd ask who'd think we're fucking dating already !"_

 

"We're not..."

John attempted with a tiny, weak voice.

 

"And now, when you perfectly knows I'm in love with you, _you reject me_ , push me away and talk to me about getting a _girlfriend_ , because you're too much a fucking cowards to face the fact you're IN LOVE WITH ME !"

 

The brunette jumped on his seat at the sudden yelling, startled, while Dirk was shaking with anger.

God, he was tired of this shit.

 

"I knew you weren't an easy guy. I knew it would require time, energy, determination. And I gave _everything of it_ , more than twice, for you, because you _worth it_."

 

Dirk took a chocked breath, tears threatening to fall again.

 

"But I never thought you would run away from your own feelings like a scared child."

It was now just a whisper, and orange eyes left the blue ones, dropping to the couch.

 

"I give up."

 

Gathering his shades, his bag, everything in his range he possessed, Dirk didn't let time for the older one to react and absconded.

 

Frozen on the couch, John was still watching the void with lost, desperate eyes when his dad came back home, finding him.

 

=======================================

 

It was luck that allowed Dave, on his break at his DJ work to the club, to spot his brother at the more far seat of the bar.

He didn't believe his own eyes first. What was Dirk doing here ? If he ever went to a bar, it was Roxanne's. The blonde never heard of his lil bro going into a club, he even only went to see him work once, and it was because John brought him.

 

Not waiting any longer, he took the seat next to him, and winced at the sight. From here, Dave could see the gold eyes red from tears and blurry from alcohol. Despite being eighteen for months, it was the first time he drank to the point to be drunk.

 

"Sup'."

The adolescent barely reacted, glancing at him before groaning and staring at his glass again.

 

"Maybe you had enough for tonight, don't ya think lil bro ?"

He never called him 'Bro', of course.

 

"I th'k I n'd m're"

Dirk vaguely stuttered, few tears rolling on his cheeks. Seeing Dave was of course making him think of John again.

 

"Nope, you're not. Wait here."

Without waiting for an answer, the DJ went to the club owner - thankfully a nice one, not a douche like he already worked for sometimes - and explained the situation to him. He allowed Dave to bring his brother home, at the condition it didn't happen again.

 

The blonde nodded, and worked on bringing his brother home. Not the best part of the night.

 

=======================================================

 

Dirk groaned, and his -oh so nice- brother laughed.

 

"That's what you get for drinking like a blackhole."

"Shhhh not so loud."

It was a begging. The younger Strider was tasting his first hangover, and HE DIDN'T LIKE IT AT ALL.

 

At least Dave was kind enough to give him aspirin, ad letting him recover a bit.

 

"So, what happened to get you in such pathetic state ?"

"...It's John."

He was mumbling, but his brother got it - mostly because he was expecting this answer.

Dave sighed.

 

"No kidding. What did he do this time ?"

 

"He's in love with me."

What.

The elder blinked once, twice, confused.

 

"And _this_ made you drink ? I thought you'd be pulling out puppets fireworks or something."

 

Dirk groaned more and settled his face in his crossed arms.

"His reaction was 'I'm not gay I'm getting myself a girlfriend to prove it'."

_Oh._

 

"Typical of John, if you ask me. Why do you think I tried to pull you guys apart ?"

Dirk moved a bit, to give a surprised glance at his brother lying on the shitty futon next to him.

 

"You... It was for _that_ ?"

Incredulity was ringing in his voice.

 

"Of course ! For what else would I fucking do this ? He's my best bro. If he wasn't such a stupid, head-deep-in-the-ass dork, I couldn't think of a better match for my own and only little brother."

A small grin flourished on his lips.

 

Dirk smiled in answer, and dropped himself to let his head fall on his brother's shoulder.

 

"Dude that's pretty gay. And incestuous."

"Fuck you."

"That's worst."

 

The two Striders chuckled like kids.

 

============================================================

 

It was weeks now. Unlike his statements, John didn't try to get a girlfriend. Instead, he spent his time like a zombie, his mind always turning and mixing thoughts.

 

Of course, the center of these was Dirk.

 

Everything he threw at John's face this day was a part of his thinking, and even if he didn't want to admit or believe them... There was a part of truth, he knew it.

 

The brunette couldn't work in this state, and informed Roxanne, who for some reasons seemed to understand perfectly and tell him to take all the time he needed - like she _knew_.

 

(And she knew, in fact. Nothing could stay unknown from Roxanne Lalonde for long.)

 

At a moment, unable to unknot the strings of his mind, the comedian decided to talk to Rose.

 

 

EB : Hello Rose.

TT : John, quite a pleasure - and a surprise - to see you.

TT : Did something happen ?

EB : you say that as if I never contact you !!

TT : Well you rarely do it without an idea in mind, at least.

TT : I do not mind, I don't contact you a lot either.

EB : haha, yeah sorry

EB : youre right, im a bit in a mess right now

TT : Feeling mess ?

EB : ... yes

TT : Oooooh~

EB : this isn't funny rose. I really need you to be helpful and. Not push me deeper okay ?

TT : Of course John. I'll be perfectly professional.

EB : something happened with dirk

TT : hmmm ?

EB : he said

EB : urgh

EB : that i love him

EB : and this is stupid, because i'm not gay

EB : not at all, okay ?

TT : Of course, John.

TT : In this case, he's just wrong, and took his hopes for reality, right ? Isn't it just that ?

EB : ...

TT : But I guess if you're pestering me to talk about this, it means it isn't that simple.

EB : yeah...

TT : Why are you confused John ?

EB : i don't know !

TT : Are you in love with him ?

EB : I DON'T KNOW !

TT : These upper cases weren't necessary John, I get your point.

TT : Let's try things differently, okay ?

EB : okay...

TT : Good. I'm asking yes or no questions, and you answer them. Is that fine with you ?

EB : ok

TT : Perfect. First of all, do you like Dirk ? Do you appreciate him ?

EB : we're friends, of course i do

TT : Do you like spending time with him ?

EB : yes. it's fun

TT : Would you, if the occasion occurred, hug, or let him hug you ?

EB : ...we already hugged few times...

TT : John, calm down. I am not judging you or anything, and these answer don't mean anything yet, except you're close friends.

EB : okay...

TT : Does the idea of you two sleeping on the same couch, or bed, bother you highly ?

EB : we

EB : we slept together because he was afraid of thunder...

EB : and we napped on the couch few times

TT : I see.

TT : Can you try to imagine Dirk going out with someone, kissing them, and tell me how you feel ?

EB : ...

EB : not, good. but it's just because i want him to find someone nice !

TT : And if this person is ? A nice person, more great than you, more fitting him, making Dirk smiling more than you do...

EB : stop with this question.

TT : Fine. How much time can you spend without seeing him ? Before you fought, that is.

EB : i don't know. one, two days ?

TT : Do you think you could kiss him ?

EB : ...

EB : stop

EB : thank you for your help rose, but i dont think it works

TT : I am sorry John. Good luck, and reach me if you need to talk, okay ?

EB : yeah... thank you

TT : Goodbye.

EB : bye

TT : But, John, I think you love him. Just remember these feelings don't make you a 'homosexual', okay ?

 

John logged out.

 

=====================================================================

 

After this conversation, John needed at least one more week of thinking before deciding on something.

 

He wanted to talk to Dirk. The brunette didn't know exactly what he wanted to say, or what he hoped to get out of this talking, but he needed it.

 

That's why the young man was standing in front of the door of the shitty Strider's apartment, hands clenching to try to calm their shaking.

Honestly, why was he here already ?

But the thought Dirk was here, few feet from him, prevented him from fleeing. Above everything... He wished to see him. It was a selfish hope, after how he treated him, but the guilt wasn't making it less strong.

 

He didn't talk to any of the Strider since the incident, so John didn't know how the adolescent was... Neither what Dave thought of all of this.

 

But he would know rather quick, because when he finally mustered enough courage to push the old doorbell, it was him who opened the door.

 

"Egbert."

Neutral tone, not a 'sup' ? Ouch, John was in deep shit.

He gulped.

 

"Hi Dave... Hum, is Dirk here ?"

If not a muscle moved on the blonde's face, he nearly _felt_ the temperature dropping a bit.

 

"Yes."

But he didn't move from the doorway. Not from an inch.

 

"C-can I see him ?"

"No."

The word was firm, inflexible.

 

"Dave, dude, I just want to talk to him a bit !"

"Sad for you really, but you can't."

The shaded boy even leaned himself on the door frame, visibly ready to spend how much time he needed for John to lose patience and go away.

 

The brunette sighed.

"Daaaaaaaave..."

 

"No."

"God Dave, I am sorry okay ?! I know I fucked up, but how am I supposed to apology if you don't let me talk to him ? And he doesn't answer his phone !"

 

A pale eyebrow quirked above the shades.

"In case you didn't get it, not answering you mean 'I don't want to talk to you, dumbass.'. So, it's still a no."

He moved suddenly, leaning a bit towards John, who took a step back by reflex.

 

"In fact, you didn't get it. I don't want you to talk to him again, _ever_."

He leaned back to take his earlier posture.

"You're still my friend dude, but forget about him. Find you a girl and let him alone."

 

John's breath was coming in and out fast, panic rising without him being able to control it. What did it mean ? Not seeing him again ? Never ?

 

"B-but we can still be friends ? Him and me. He just needs time to recover and talk to me again, right ?"

"No. It's over for your friendship, it's even over for any kind of relationship for you both."

 

A small, chocking noise escaped the comedian.

"You can't decide this on your own !!"

"We discussed this together. He agreed with me."

 

It was like a giant stone dropping into John's stomach.

"He... Accepted to not see me again ? Ever ?"

"Yeah. We both thought it was for the best."

 

John couldn't believe it. He didn't imagine this option. He didn't think Dirk would never want to see him again !

Totally lost, he stared in the void, through Dave as if he wasn't seeing him.

 

"I don't want to..."

"Hm ?"

"I DON'T WANT TO !"

The yell made the Strider twitch, slightly surprised.

John approached his best bro, desperation and determination sharing his gaze.

 

"Dave, for god's sake, I just want to see him ! I have to talk to him ! At least apology !"

"Send your apologizes in a text for me, I'll show him if I judge them acceptable."

 

Fury took over, and John grabbed his friend's shirt.

"Wow dude, don't force me to manhandle you."

"Shut your trap Dave ! This isn't your place to decide ! He can make his own choices !"

"And I tell you he chose to never see you again."

The words pierced both his anger and his heart, making them pop like bubbles like an arrow.

 

Tears grew in the blue eyes, falling on his cheeks and clothes.

This, unlike the rest, made Dave lose his composure.

 

"This is better for you both, John. Trust me."

 

The brunette shook his head vividly, like a kid refusing to listen his parent.

"You don't understand..."

John started to sob quietly.

"I-I _miss_ him... I want to see him, I want to _hug_ him for fuck's sake I am just so... Lost..."

 

Shocked, Dave was staring at his friend, not believing what he was hearing. To be honest, he didn't believe his brother when he told him John was in love with him, but now...

 

"Why don't you go look for a girlfriend then ?"

"BECAUSE I WANT _HIM_ , DAVE !!!"

 

His hands flew to his mouth, and it was hard to say who was the more shocked between the two mans.

 

At this instant, all that was in John's mind was 'ABSCOND', but then, a small voice rose from behind Dave.

 

"Really ?"

Hearing it, both looked at the newcomer, and Dave moved to let Dirk appear in the entrance of the small apartment.

 

The adolescent wasn't looking at him, thought.

His gaze was locked on John, shades nowhere to be seen.

 

To see Dirk made all thought of leaving vanish from John's brain. Instead, it was like finding an oasis after a walk in the desert. If the brunette panicked at the strong feeling of happiness and need the sight of the other provoked, it also prevented him from fleeing.

 

"Yes..."

Blushing and looking now at the floor, John was trying to push away the yelling side of him who was having a breakdown.

A few light sounds were heard, and when the comedian lifted his head, Dirk and him were alone in the hallway, the door closed behind the blonde.

 

"What do you want from me, John."

His look was terribly serious, and the brunette knew it was a last chance Dirk was giving him. He could either apology, lightening his guilt and leave - but that meant never seeing Dirk again, he believed Dave was serious about it.

 

Or.

Or he could change things. But that meant change _himself_. Change his way of thinking.

And he didn't know if he was ready for that.

 

His gaze captured the whole sight of the adolescent in front of him, his throat tightening with feelings. Patient, the aim of his eyes didn't move or speak, letting him take his time.

A thought crossed John's mind, and his heartbeats fastened.

 

Slowly, as if he expected a meteor to land right on him for only thinking of doing _this_ , the brunette took few steps towards the other.

 

Until he was just in front of him, separated by few inches. Even if Dirk talked right now, the comedian was sure he couldn't hear it over the noise of his pumping blood.

 

Something would go wrong. At this point, he was even sure the world was about to fucking explode, and a part of him wished it would.

 

Even more slowly than his steps, his hands rose to cup Dirk's cheeks.

 

Maybe he was about to collapse ? That sounded good too.

But no, he was still here, alive and awake, and witnessed Dirk's eyes growing a bit wider, while a blush spread on his freckled cheeks.

His face, until then neutral, melted into a begging, hopeful expression, the adolescent gulping and giving a desperate glance.

 

John's mind was like stuck in ice, not able to think anymore, but with time passing he saw the hope burning like phoenix to turn to dust, and it just, _hurt_ so much to see the sadness replace it.

And then the blonde's hands came to John's, starting to gently push them away.

 

_NO !_

 

The brunette's mind yelled with all his strength, and suddenly his mouth was on Dirk's. He didn't even felt himself move, and it was quite a pitiful kiss to be honest.

Carefully, John pulled back, looking at the adolescent in embarrassment.

 

And Dirk...

Dirk _laughed_.

Quite a broken, halfhearted sound.

 

"John really, stop this, this is pathetic."

The brunette could see the hints of tears in the golden eyes, but that didn't prevent him from being offended.

 

"O-okay it was a bit clumsy but-"

"But nothing. Let's stop this mess before it gets anymore stupid and forget it, okay ?"

 

His hands landed on John's chest, trying to push him away.

The young man frowned, not appreciating to be treated like a child by an adolescent younger than him.

"No."

 

Dirk sighed, feeling like trying to manage a stubborn kid.

"Listen. You don't really want to be with me, so let's just not see each other again. You're just kissing me because of some stupid pride or I don't knmmmff ?!"

 

Really, John was pretty tired of the Striders's rambles. This time the kiss was aimed better, and he pressed more firmly his mouth on the blonde's lips.

He distinctly felt the adolescent _shiver_ , and a small part of him grinned in pride.

 

But when he broke the kiss, smiling, John felt on a broken, ‘ready to fall in tears’ expression on the blonde's face.

 

"Dirk ? God I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you cry I-..."

"Why did you do this ?"

 

Dirk pressed him, voice harsh despite his obvious sadness.

"I, hum, don't really kn-"

"If you say you don't know I swear to god I'm hitting you in the guts."

 

John sweated.

 

"...Because I wanted to ?"

Doubtful eyes meet his own.

 

"Dirk I... I can't tell you I'm 100% sure of myself, but if you're right and I love you then. I think it worth. Trying ? At least pay you back for all the efforts you made for an idiot like me..."

 

Dirk's breath was nearly cut. Did he hear well ?

"John. If it's for running away as soon as I try to hold your hand or pushing me away when I try to kiss you it's-"

 

The new kiss was better than the last one.

When it stopped, blonde eyelids fluttered, golden pupils trying to focus on John.

Each time they kissed, Dirk was losing the will to push him away.

What was the use of all this talk with Dave, settling that John was a dork that would never abandon his adored heterosexuality, and that he should stay away from him ?

 

Visibly, John noticed the power his kisses had on the blonde, and performed a new one.

Dirk moaned slightly, half because of the kiss and half because of the realization hitting him.

He was losing the fight. John was leading the dance, bringing him where he wanted, without him being able to fight back.

 

Because of course, Dirk was the only one really affected by the kisses.

 

His hands grabbed John's arms, all his being on the verge of breaking down into a mess.

"Tell me you won't flee... Please tell me I can't count on you, tell me you'll _try your best_ , that's all I ask..."

His now crying face was looking desperately at John, a so many time broken hope growing again in the blonde.

 

The young man blushed, troubled by how cute he looked right now - no matter how much he felt like a dick for liking the sad and hopeful look on Dirk's face.

 

"Yeah... Yes I can do that."

It was a mutter, that ended on the blonde's lips because they were kissing again, Dirk's brain leaving him at the delightful pressure he dreamed so many times of, finally real.

 

"Are you...Are you asking me out then ?"

There was still insecurity in his voice, still a part of his soul not believing all this. Dirk was careful.

 

 

"Well, I guess I am ?"

John giggled nervously, hand on in his hair like usual.

 

"John."

A frown showed up on the blonde's face.

"Okay okay I am. Asking you out. I-I want to be your boyfriend, happy ?"

He stuttered, flushing a bright red.

 

It brought a little smile on Dirk's lips.

"Close to. But I need a... Proof, John. That's too easy, coming back here and making puppy eyes at me and getting forgiven with a few kisses. That's not fair."

Arms crossed, the adolescent was serious.

 

"What do you mean."

John groaned.

"It's... A bit early for me to go running in the town while yelling that I'm in love with you or something like this."

 

The image caused a chuckle to Dirk.

"Good idea, I'll keep that for later. But no, I was thinking of something else."

 

Heavy sigh.

"Go on, lay it on me."

 

Golden eye locked into blue ones.

"Tell your Dad you're dating me."

 

It was like John's breath suddenly got stuck in his lungs. What did Dirk ask him ?!

"You can't be serious."

 

Disappointment flourished into Dirk's gaze.

"I guess this answer your question then. No John, I don't want to be your boyfriend."

 

"Wait, Dirk I- !!"

 

The sound of the closing door was all that answered John's plea.

 

=========================================================

 

Glancing above his coffee, John tried for the hundredth time to assemble his courage.

 

After nearly two days of thinking, the need of Dirk was coming back with full strength, to the point he could hardly think of anything else.

Since when was he so _addicted_ to him ?

It seemed like kissing him only made the brunette more avid to have Dirk close.

 

It's the reason why he was here, at the table of the kitchen, drinking coffee and staring discreetly at his Dad like trying to finding the best to attack.

 

"You want to ask me something, John ?"

Okay, maybe not so discreetly.

The young man looked away, nibbling his lips as his mind was desperately trying to not enter in panic mode.

 

"Son, I can guarantee you I won’t judge you or be mad, whatever happened."

The man reached, to land his hand on John’s shoulder, who released a sigh. The gesture was half soothing, half more stressing.

He didn’t know how to bring the subject.

 

"You... Noticed Dirk doesn’t come here anymore ?"

The question was offered carefully, the brunette feeling his feet taping nervously against the tiled floor.

 

"Yes, I did. I guessed you two had a fight."

His dad answered gently, not imposing.

 

‘Yeah, sort of..."

With a loud sigh, John brought his hand to his hair, messing them up. Jame was waiting patiently, all fatherly listening and gentle understanding.

 

For a second, his brain wished he’d actually be mad, yell, something, and then he could blame Dirk for this mess and would had an excuse for all this-

The comic shook his head harshly. It wasn’t like him to think that way. Dirk deserved better. Didn’t John promised to do his best, anyway ? Time to prove it wasn’t just words.

 

"He’s. He’s in love with me."

He finally blurted out, feeling out of breath. The man blinked, small surprise sparkling in the soft eyes, as if it wasn’t what he expected to hear.

 

"I am not really surprised by this information."

It was politely pointed out.

 

Following this was a nodding from John, and more lips nibbling. That wasn’t exactly what he wanted to say, either, but it was a good start.

 

"He also mentioned... That it was. Uh. Reciprocate ?"

His voice got high pitched at the last word, and he coughed in embarrassment, not looking at his father.

 

"And was he right ?"

Jame simply said after a moment, seeing John was struggling with a way to continue the conversation.

 

"M-maybe ? I’m not sure ?"

It was hardly stuttered, insecurity coming back in full force into the brunette’s heart. Now Dirk wasn’t under his eyes, it was harder to focus on how important all of this was, and the urge to flee was winning the fight.

 

"To be totally honest Son, I thought you were a couple already. For at least weeks, if not months."

 

His mouth gaping open, John stared at his Dad in blatant betrayal. Did his parent believed he was gay from the beginning ?!

 

"W-why ?"

 

With a tender smile, James answered, chuckling a bit.

"Son, I know you. I would be blind if I missed the way you were looking at him... And he sure gave them back when you weren’t watching. Even his shades couldn’t hide it."

 

A big, hard blush invaded the brunette’s cheeks.

"You... N-no ? I mean I wasn't looking at him differently than a friend would !"

 

His Dad rose an eyebrow in such a Dave-like way at this that helped by the nervousness, John felt a laugh bubble in his throat.

He kept it inside thought, rather looking at the floor while turning the words from the man in his mind.

 

"Was everyone... Thinking we were dating already ?"

 

James patted his head in a fatherly way.

"Only someone who wouldn't know you and your eternal speech of 'no homo'."

 

Heavy sigh left the comedian, who hid his face in his hands.

 

"...Thought someone knowing that and seeing you cuddling with the young Strider could think you changed your mind."

 

Loud groan of suffering.

 

===========================================================

After the 67th ringing (at least, John was sure he pushed the button that many), a not-totally-awake-but-totally-angry Dave opened the door with an absolute lack of joy of life.

 

"John. Th'fuck y're doin' here."

The dude certainly worked this night, until early this morning. Ooops.

 

Not impressed, the brunette crossed his arms, pouting a bit.

"Dirk isn't answering his phone again ! I need to talk to him."

 

"God you two s'r'sly get on m'nerves. He's at momlal's. Now fuck off."

Not-got-enough-sleep Dave wasn't a happy fellow, to say the least.

 

"Okay, thank-"

Bang of the door closed forcefully.

"...You."

 

===========================================================

It was rather early in the morning, and John had no idea what the fuck Dirk was doing at Roxanne's bar. The thing wasn't even open at this our.

 

Nonetheless, he took the way of the pub, impatience and nervousness nibbling slightly his heart. It was still a possibility the blonde changed his mind, or decided he took to long. Oh god, what if he started dating someone else already ?!

 

John decided to stop this train of thought after nearly crashing his car in another one, who honked at him angrily.

 

Finally the shop was in sight, and the brunette parked his car, not really caring about placing it nicely.

When he entered the place, heart pounding in a close to painful way, it was only to find Dirk and Roxanne in deep, happy chatting.

 

They were each on a side of the bar, with a drink (obviously orange juice for Dirk and some alcohol for the Lalonde Mom) and the women was talking with a big grin, surely telling on of her silly story about the bar, making big gestures to emphasize her point.

 

In front of her, the blonde was listening with attention, shades on his hair rather than in front of his eyes, and a small smile that showed up against his will, the adolescent not able to fully contain his amusement towards Roxanne's enthusiasm.

 

He was... Dazzling.

That was stupid, he was doing nothing ! Just sitting there, happy.

But John's stomach was doing this stupid thing, and the pounding of his heart was nothing due to nervousness now.

 

At first. But then, his mind gathered some brain cell, and the thought ' _Why the fuck would he go out with me ?'_ popped in.

 

His gaze dropped to the floor and he frowned, suddenly filled with doubt. Until now, John did nothing but being shitty with Dirk, rejecting him, hurting his feelings.

Why would he now accept to be his. Boyfriend ?

 

Unable to face the adolescent, not with these thoughts, the comedian took the decision to abscond discreetly, but at this instant Roxanne spotted him.

 

"Jooooohn~ ! My dear, I didn't know you were heeere ! Come in !"

Both were now looking at him, and the brunette made a point of avoiding the gold pupils, missing then the disappointment that replaced the happiness on Dirk's face.

 

Not having any choice now (you _don't_ say no to Roxanne Lalonde) John joined them sitting next to his friend still without looking at him.

 

"How are you ? I didn't see you for sooooo long !"

She chirped happily, messing his hair clumsily. The gesture made him chuckle half-heartly, his brain too much aware of the boy only few inches from him.

 

Said boy sighed, then jumped on his feet, shades back on his eyes in the process.

"I think I gonna head back home. See ya Rox'."

"Aaaw already ?"

The women pouted, making puppy eyes.

 

Panicked, John dropped from his own chair, nearly falling in the process.

"W-wait ! I'll drive you back !"

 

But his offer met the typical, neutral striderface.

"No, thank you."

 

_Fuck fuck fuck !_

That wasn't going as planned. Well to be honest John didn't have any plan, but it was going at the opposite of what he wished.

And the rejection sure didn't help his doubts at the moment.

"Please ! I need to talk to you !"

 

His hand reached to grab the blonde's wrist, and the look of annoyance that appeared on the younger's face nearly made John retreat.

He saw the mouth open, most likely to refuse again, and his own rushed more fast than his brain.

 

"I said my dad we're dating !!!"

Out of breath, John had no idea how he got the guts to burst this, but the look on Dirk's face worthed it. For once, the shades were doing a poor job at hiding his expression, shock spread in full display.

 

"...Ok. Let's go."

He muttered finally, and the brunette felt his whole body relax a bit. He released the wrist, following the other outside.

 

"Ooookaaaay ? Bye guys ?"

The women muttered to the now empty room, for long forgotten by the two lovebirds.

"OH MY GOSH I MUST CALL NEPETA !!!"

 

============================================================

 

They entered the Egbert's house, the travel in car having been spend without a word. Following his old habits, Dirk aimed for the couch, dropping his body on it before staring expectantly at the older boy standing at the entrance of the living room.

 

Seeing no information seemed ready to leave the mouth of John right away, the blonde sighed and accepted to be the one making the first step. Again.

Shades were removed, and when he glanced back again at the brunette, Dirk could see the distinct flinch.

 

"So ? You were talking about your Dad, I think. Was it just a trick to bring me here ? Should I warn Dave I got kidnapped ?"

The slight, mocking tone got John out of his frozen state, and he shook his head before joining the adolescent on the couch.

 

"No, it was the truth, I swear ! I talked to him. For real."

Of course Dirk couldn't help but make a doubtful face. If John wasn't one to lie, it was still hard to believe he that easily admitted to his _Dad_ he was dating a guy.

 

"And, what did you say, exactly ?"

Carefully, eyes looking at the blue eyed boy for any hints of lies or hiding, Dirk requested.

 

The obvious way the blonde was not fully trusting him made John pout.

"In fact, he admitted he was thinking we were dating for a while already..."

The pout increased at the reveal, turning nearly into sulking.

 

Relieved, Dirk rolled his eyes, but a grin was eating his lips nonetheless.

"Told you. You were acting like a god damn boyfriend already, minus the kisses."

 

His remark was rewarded with more sulking from the brunette. Chuckling, hope attempting timidly to make a nest in his heart again, the blonde approached his... Boyfriend ? Was he allowed to call him that now ?

 

He stopped few inches from him, hesitant. Nothing was won yet, Dirk knew that. At anytime, the comedian could freak out and flee.

But if he did... He wouldn't try to get him back this time. John promised to try his best, that was supposed to mean to not chicken at the slightest show of affection, further since they were alone right now.

 

And fuck, Dirk wanted a kiss !

 

Shyly, lightly blushing from a bunch of various feelings, he approached a bit more, his chest meeting John's shoulder.

Blue eyes jerked in his directions, widening at the realization of how close he was, and red spread on the young man's cheeks as he quickly looked away.

 

"Come on. Are you going to sulk like a kid ? I thought I was the youngest he-"

Oh well. Dirk really liked this way of shutting him.

It was their sixth kiss, and it made the blonde's whole body shudder violently. When the kiss stopped and he dared open his eyes, it was to end into the conflicted gaze of John.

 

It was obvious the comic wasn't sure of himself with this, and had still doubts, but he wasn't panicking or running away so Dirk considered it as an improvement. A dark, resigned part of him kept telling it was a lost case, that John would never really accept this relationship.

 

But something certainly showed up on his face, because he was kissed again. Not resisting this time, his hand came shyly to the crow-colored hair, mixing up with the bangs.

 

Their lips were moving gently against each other, one trying to not frighten and the other testing the water.

Still, John couldn't deny it was _good_ , and that he was _happy_.

Dirk was here, and he'll see him again. Whenever he wanted to, in fact. They were now officially allowed to spend all their free time together if they wished, and the thought made the brunette shiver in delight, pressing more firmly against Dirk.

Not only his lips, but his whole body as well, wrapping an arm leisurely around the adolescent's middle.

Pleasantly surprised, the blonde let a moan escape. He regretted it right away, and as expected the kiss stopped. _Don't flee don't flee pleasepleaseplease..._

 

But unlike Dirk was thinking, John didn't moved more than few inches, and didn't seem bother or panicked. Furthermore, he was looking at the blonde with a hint of wonder in his eyes, making him starting to believe he was dreaming.

 

"Can we... Can we watch a movie ? Together ?" The ‘dream’ muttered, nearly against his lips.

Not pointing how dumb the phrasing sounded, Dirk rather smiled gently.

 

"Is that a date, Mister Egbert ?"

The other groaned in answer.

 

"Don't call me that, jeez. And... Yeah okay. Movie date."

The blonde smile grew without him unable to do anything to prevent it.

"Fuck yeah."

 

With no idea what fucking disaster he experienced in his past life for being so lucky, Dirk spent the movie date (movies being all John's pick, but not everything could be perfect) cuddling with his boyfriend, even getting few kisses.

 

God, he couldn't remember when was the last time he felt so happy, and to be perfectly honest John was thinking the same thing.


End file.
